Baconator On A Pole Match?

12_Pole_Matches

by Mitch Nickelson

Pointed out by rajah.com, a long-standing beef (get it?) between Jim Cornette and Vince Russo has received an unlikely arbitrator…fast food mega-giant Wendy’s.

The mysterious person who runs Wendy’s official twitter account seems to be up on their wrestling rivalries because Russo and Cornette are not exactly household names to today’s audience. Both men at one point or another have been considered some of the more influential persons in wrestling’s most important time periods. They both have their detractors as well. Here is a more complete account of the exchange…

Vince Russo: “I’d love to have peace with Jim Cornette. But, I can’t do that alone. Maybe one day he will open up.”

Jim Cornette after a Russo fan chimed in: “Please keep your “fans” at the kid’s table, they’re bleeding over into my adults’ conversation–”

Russo: “Speaking of adult conversations. Why don’t we have one so we can end this foolishness. Life is too short, Jim.”

Cornette: “Some people’s are not short enough–”

Russo fan: “Irony here is Jim is eating a @Wendys triple with cheese while he typed that.”

Wendy’s: “We could settle this with a Baconator on a pole match. ;)”

Cornette: “I might do it for Wendy, but she changed her meat!”

At this point, you might be asking yourself, “Just what is a Baconator on a Pole Match?” Good question. Sometimes the item at the top of the pole is used as a weapon and the match doesn’t necessarily end. Other times, the item at the top of the pole is the prize that the wrestlers are battling over and retrieving said item means that the match is over. It can be sort of like a ladder match.

Since there has never been a Baconator On A Pole match before, we’ll need to consult other ‘…On A Pole’ matches throughout wrestling’s history. Here are two matches with something on a pole, one being a somewhat good idea and the other being an extremely bad idea.

GOOD IDEA: Christmas Present On A Pole Match

This is a recent ‘…On A Pole Match,’ happening on the 2013 Christmas edition of Raw. Dolph Ziggler and Fandango (with Summer Rae) battled it out while a Christmas present hung on a pole high above a corner post. Fandango won the present, which represented a #1 Contender shot at the Intercontinental Championship. This is a somewhat sensible use of this gimmick match.

viagra

BAD IDEA: Viagra On A Pole Match

Near the end of WCW, Shane Douglas and Billy Kidman were involved in some atrocity known as a “Viagra On A Pole Match.” Torrie Wilson and Ernest “The Cat” Miller have something to do with this. I’ve personally never seen this match and have no intentions of doing so. I think whoever got the Viagra won, maybe?
                                                                                                                                               

That’s a fun news item for today. Remember to follow me @MitchNickelson and of course check back here for all the fun stuff from Mitch and Al and Rosie. The format of this site might change slightly over the next couple of weeks, but it should be for the better. Al and I have been talking about podcasts, so hopefully that happens.

 

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